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7 Reasons to Prioritize Self-Love

Updated: Aug 11, 2023

"Love is the bridge between you and everything."- Rumi

Choosing self love has the power to unleash your full potential. Your FULL potential.

It is therefore no wonder that self love is the subject of many self-help books, poems, songs, movies, workshops and todo lists; “Get more self love, check!”.

Nevertheless, self love is something that we tend to see as a luxury. An utopian dream that might happen in the future. Next weekend. Next month. When I go on vacation. Or when I retire.

“I just need to get through this week, project or struggle, and then…”

When self love is diminished to a luxury moment in Ibiza in the future, it is taken out of our present day reality. Imagine yourself saying to your child, partner or another important person in your life: "is it okay if we see each other in a year’s time, cause I’m quite busy at the moment?"

As with a relationship with another person, the relationship to yourself requires care, patience and time. One of the myths about self love is that it can happen in an instant or over night. For most people, it is a long-term relationship that, if cared for, can transform yourself, your life and your external relations in entirely magical ways.

Self love is the seed of your power

When you devote time for your self love, you might be surprised how this can manifest in your life:

  1. Discover what is purely you: Self love is not about achieving og becoming something. It’s about tapping into who you already are deep within. As you slow down and give yourself a loving hug, you allow the silent whisper of your deeper wisdom to breach through. You begin to remember the perceptions, passions, expressions, needs, desires, and dreams, which are purely you. So you can take the decisions and actions that are in deep alignment with your true nature.

  2. Calibrate to love: The more you practice self love, the more your body will begin to create a new “energetic muscle memory” that includes a loving lightness towards yourself. You will begin to calibrate to an expanded state of love, joy and gratitude and will find yourself laughing more, dreaming again and feeling the magic of life, in and around you.

  3. Feel unconditional happiness: As you connect with the source of love from within, you’ll realize that you can tap into deep fulfillment, regardless of your outer circumstances. You are not waiting for a promotion, a perfect partner, or material things to make you feel whole and happy. Because you know that you are already everything you need to be.

  4. Attract loving & meaningful relationships: It’s an old, quite well-worn cliche, but yet so true expression: “loving yourself will attract great love to you from others”. As you heighten your vibrational frequency through self love practices, you will begin to attract the type of mates, friends and co-creators who generate a similar high frequency of joy, light and love; helping you to build loving, transforming and enriching relations.

  5. Act in generosity: You will find out that focusing on self love is an act of great generosity. The more filled up you are, the more you’ll have to give and share with others. In this way, your self love journey will positively affect and upgrade every relationship in your life. From the inside out, you are becoming a guardian of love itself.

  6. Stay in your power: You will be much less likely to get knocked off center by energies that aren’t yours. When you are walking down the street, driving on the highway, or talking with a snappy boss, you won’t lose connection with yourself.

  7. Heal your wounds: As you take this journey into deeper self love, you will find yourself naturally letting go of that which no longer serves your growth and wellbeing. From childhood, adolescence and adulthood, grief and old feelings of lack of love can surface. Know that these feelings are revealing themselves so that they can move through you. You are releasing the contracted parts of yourself to allow in the expanded parts of yourself.

Making self love a part of your everyday reality

So how do we take self love out of the realms of philosophy and fantasy and into the real world?

There are as many ways of being self loving as we are people on this earth. Questions you can ask yourself are:

“What lights me up”?

“What makes me feel soothed, inspired and/or joyful?”

And it’s okay if you don’t know right now. Don’t worry, it will come. Below are some self love suggestions that I hope may be supportive for you.

Powerful self love practices

  • Spend time in nature

  • Explore your creativity: whatever that looks like for you. It might be through music, writing, gardening, cooking, art, movement; whatever gets your creative juices flowing.

  • Engage in touch: self touch or touch by others.

  • Ground yourself: this might be meditating, breathing exercises, listening to music or anything that helps you feel conscious and present.

  • Say self-love affirmations to yourself: e.g. “I am perfect exactly the way I am. I allow myself to be who I truly am”. This practice is especially strong if you say the affirmations to yourself everyday for at least 30 days to encode the loving beliefs in your subconscious mind.

One of my favorite self love go-tos is SOMA Breath meditation that includes a powerful combination of the above listed practices - music, affirmations, touch, guided meditation and breathwork - to calibrate your body toheightened frequencies of love, joy and gratitude.

If you are curious to experience SOMA Breath on your own body:

Self loving challenge

No matter how your self love practice looks like, the most important thing is priority and consistency. The same way as you would schedule time for your work and friends, make it a habit to schedule “you” time.

As a heartful challenge for yourself, devote 3 hours a week for self love activities (e.g 3 time slots of 1 hour) and see which changes you feel in yourself and in your outer world. You may be surprised.

Big love,


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